What could happen if you reach out instead of staying silent.

With it being Mental Health Awareness Month I wanted to talk about what could happen if you reach out instead of staying silent.

The thought of reaching out could feel really hard and difficult.  You may never have spoken to anyone before about what is burdening you.  You may not know what it would feel like to say the words that you have been burying out loud to anyone, let alone to someone you have never met before.

Your perception of a therapist may be stern, behind a desk, smartly dressed perhaps you are worried that you may be asked to lie down on a couch like in the movies.  

You may feel worried what the therapist may think about you if you say what has been on your mind, how you have been feeling. 

Even reading this may start to make you feel shaky or apprehensive.

I want to reassure you that your thoughts, fears or worries around starting therapy are the same or similar to many others.  They are also your thoughts, fears and worries, they are not your reality. 

You may be pleasantly surprised when you see your therapist for the first time.  They may be younger than you.  They may have the same dress sense as you.  There may not be a desk or a lounge sofa in sight. 

Once you have made contact with a therapist or had your first session your reality vs what you thought may happen at therapy may be very different.

Having someone to talk to that isn’t a friend or a family member may feel releasing and safe.  Having a space where you can feel heard may feel empowering.  Therapy may be a way to help you to process your thoughts instead of keeping them tucked away in your head.

Over time you may also notice changes in your body, that ache in your chest may start to be less prominent and perhaps overtime disappear.

I remember keeping my silence for years afraid of what others would think, if I would be judged, if I could afford it.  When I did finally have therapy I remember feeling sad that I had not started sooner.  That I allowed my ‘what ifs’ that were in my thoughts to dictate my reality.  Those ‘what if’s’ that I had spent so long spinning in my head never even happened.

I only chose whom I wanted to know that I was going to therapy, it was my decision who I chose to tell about starting therapy.  I didn’t feel judged by my therapist and I was able to afford it.  

What I didn’t anticipate and I wish I had was how I would feel since having therapy.  Being able to choose and have choices with how I live and do life felt and still does feel very freeing.  

Knowing more about myself and liking myself feels incredible and at the time I never thought would happen.  Standing in front of the mirror for long periods of time feeling comfortable in myself has been releasing.  Cheering myself on and quietening the critical inner voice has been a game changer.  The list goes on

If I could speak to my younger self as a young mum trying to carry a lot I would gently tell her to try therapy.  To put aside the ‘what ifs’ that are spinning in my younger self’s head and tell her that they shouldn’t dictate my life.  I would gently agree with her that while starting therapy will feel hard, choosing to go will offer a safe space and a place to feel heard. I would tell my younger self to give therapy a go and see how I feel.

So I would gently encourage you to consider going.  To try to put the ‘what if’s’ that you may have circling and to give therapy a go.  

If this has jarred you and you want to start therapy but not too sure of next steps please get in touch here.